I always kept a gratitude journal in the past because I have a low self-esteem and my Aunt advised me to do one. It was really therapeutic -- to be able to write down everything that I'm thankful for, even the smaller things/victories. I don't know when and why I stopped doing it but I would love to start again. A lot of good things had happened to me lately and I'm writing it here in my blog before the thoughts will start to wilt away in my head. I will try to be vague at some point because some things are meant to be kept within myself. :) 

Him. I am always thankful for Him. Last week, I had an interview for a new job; and knowing me, I have this fear of talking in public and sometimes, with strangers. I know its pretty normal to be scared with interviews but I get anxiety attacks (palms sweating, negative thoughts starts to crowd my mind, my body turns cold, jumpy) and I walk away and decide not go with the process which is not the right thing to do. I know I'm smart and I can speak english well but I always underestimate myself. I have a mild OCD and I obsessively think worse in situations (what if I answer wrongly? What if I start to stutter? Will he judge me?). Anyway, I prayed to him to give me an interviewer whom I won't find intimidating. And to my surprise, he gave me an interviewer who is a Josenian alumna just like me. Lord, you have a funny way of answering my prayers. Thank you.

Confidence. I don't know where I found this boldness but I'm trying to control my anxieties now and face every scary things head-on. I started to stand up for myself too.

Save more. I started learning how to be financially smart but I'm postponing my plans to start doing so because I'm planning to buy a new phone haha

Family and friends. Because they are always there to support me on my decisions.

Sponsor. That's a secret.

Lessen my social media accounts. I want my life to be more private but don't worry, I'm active on twitter because I find it therapeutic to post what's on my mind and I can be spontaneous. I like it more because nobody cares. I'm still undecided whether I should delete my instagram account or not.

New hobby. This year, I started doing brush lettering, and watercolor.

Unwind. To keep me sane.

Television shows and online articles. It keeps me informed and entertained. 

Photographs. What way to tell a story?

Books. I love books. My latest read was Every Last Word by Tamara Ireland Stone. That book inspired me to write this post.

Coffee. Ahh who doesn't love coffee?

Hot shot roll. My current favorite maki from Red Kimono.

Words and Journals. Because without them, how can I express myself?

Thinking if I should post like this more in the future. What do you think? :)

Happy New Year everyone!! How was your holidays? Mine was like a roller coaster ride. Most days, I was not really feeling the holiday spirit because all my energy was focused on different things. I was feeling low when we didn't fly our tickets to Hong Kong for some stupid reason made by one person, so that was a waste of money and energy. A contrast between excitedly packing our bags to disappointingly unpacking it. I was also sad that I won't be using the winter clothes that I bought anytime soon especially the coat and boots. I even coordinated my outfits in different days so that was a bummer! There are two things I learned from this experience -- "never trust someone who is not ready to commit" and "don't fall for false reassurances because they are all just white lies".

Enough with this sad shit. On the brighter side, I got over it and I did fairly enjoy my holidays. I spent it learning a new thing, well not really a new thing. I just honed my handwriting and lettering skills. Don't be surprised that whenever I'm inside a bookstore, I will either haul pens or notebooks. I was literally screaming inside, "take all of my money!!" which was true in the end. This crazy obsession will bankrupt me!! Lol.

All of these pens are from Zig except for the last one on the right. They are used for my lettering. L-R: Zig brush writer in black, Zig Kuretake water brush in medium point, Zig wink of stella in silver, Zig wink of stella in brown (NB ran out of gold), Zig Cocoiro letter pen pink pen holder and black ink in fine brush point (they are sold separately), and Uni fine point in black 0.2. Bought these pens from NBS (their branch in SM seaside is the only branch that sells a wide variety of Zig pens. Really!) and BTC.

Bought some colored pens. Dong-a my metal from NBS and colored pen set from Daiso.

Of course, you need a notebook/pad to write on. L-R: Grid paper refill from Muji, calligraphy pad from SM department store and Rhodia dot pad from Fullybooked.

I'm still improving .. :)

Bought another coloring book because I hate my first one. Coloring book from colon (thanks to my friend Carla for buying this for me) and Prang watercolor from NBS.

Scored these books for a cheaper price from Booksale. I love Booksale!!

Before, I always tell myself and everyone that I don't like to wear make-up because I want to look natural. Now, I see myself differently -- I look dull. I always ask myself, "would it hurt to at least put some touch of color in my face and take the effort to look nice?". So I had a changed of heart. I started to put some make-up in my face but nothing heavy. I only use BB cream to hide some dark spots, lip color, and mascara.

My favorite lip balm!! It's a matte balm from Revlon. The last three on the right was a gift from my friend who is from Texas. L-R: elusive (and also the last one on the right. Its a nude pink color), sultry (my favorite color from the bunch! Its a mauve color), fierce (nude brown), and passionate (purple).

Compact mirror included from the three set of matte balm. Hi, guys!! :)

Thank you to my friends Rachelle, Novea and the couple Portia and Darryl for that wonderful night.

I love Nyx!! They smell so good! L-R: soft matte lip cream in Cairo (nude brown), soft matte lip cream in Istanbul (pink), and butter lipstick in candy buttons (peach pink).

These cute perfumes which are given to me from the U.S. L-R: Eternity, Kenzo and BVLGARI.

In the hopes of salvaging (that sounded a little morbid lol) my holiday spirit, I bought these things below:

Black bag from Parfois. I always wanted a black bag for everyday use. This one looks a tad bit like the bag I'm lusting from Kate Spade which is so expensive!!

Because I needed a more mature wallet. Wallet from Parfois. Fact: I love a wallet that has a lot of compartment.

The last one that made my Christmas eve happy was maki!! California maki and spicy salmon maki are my favorites from Red Kimono.

I was invited by my friend who is a teacher to attend their Christmas party as a photographer. I had fun with the kids and I got to bring home a lot of food.

These kids know how to smile for the camera.

My favorite kids who are so adorable:

.. and Jamilla. <3

Lastly, our friend Charity together with her now fiancee, Onin went here in Cebu to tell us that they are engaged and are set to marry next year. Charity is the first person in my circle of friends who is getting married and I'm so happy for her!! Ahhh I feel old already.

December was a great month. I ended my 2015 by watching fireworks at my window and of course, spending it with my family. I hope you guys ended your 2015 with a bang! This year, 2016, will be better. Again, Happy New Year!

You may think I'm posting this just to brag that I bought expensive things, but I'm posting this because I'm proud of myself. I bought these things because I worked for it, and I deserve it. I don't normally go and spend money on grander things except if its my birthday, Christmas or if I really really want that particular object (and if the price is justifiable). If you know me well, I'm really tight when it comes to money, and I do a lot of saving. I don't like to call myself a tightwad because I spend on small things, and I lend or give money to those in need. I'm a compassionate person, and I do charity works when I can. So excuse my language, but fuck those people who judged me. I think judging people you don't know for things you don't understand is stupid. I'm a sensitive person, and some days you just can't ignore negative comments. But I've learned the hard way not to let any negativity get in to me. And you are welcome to unfollow me on any social media accounts I have anytime. So to those who can relate, just do whatever makes you happy.

On the positive note, I bought these two shoes as an advance gift to myself. I've been meaning to buy a shoe for the past months, but it was a struggle to find the perfect one. The shoes I was eyeing either doesn't have a size for my feet or they ran out of stock. The adidas neo lite racer doesn't have the size and the shoe color that I want. The air jordan 1 low doesn't have a smaller size because it is a man shoe (lol). My mom keeps on telling me to save my money, and just buy in Hong Kong (finally we are pushing our trip this november. I'm so excited!!). But the reason I'm buying a shoe is so I can bring it in Hong Kong, and I really want to buy myself a gift.

So yesterday, I saw this nike roshe run in purple and pink at the mall. The colors are eye catching (I'm just bias because pink is my favorite color. The purple is cute too!). But I've read in some online reviews that roshe run shoes are being worn by people who think they are "cool" aka "teenagers" (see how judgmental people are?). Who cares? I love the colors and comfort wise? It feels comfortable to walk in it. See what I did there? Yup, I don't plan on using this baby when I go jogging. Its too cute to  just ruin it hahaha I'm wearing this on my casual and laid back days.

I ended up buying two shoes because I couldn't resist this white sneakers from Call It Spring. My original plan was to buy white and/or black shoes so I can match it on any outfits. This baby right here was love at first sight. It may not be as good as the air jordan 1 low but its way more cheaper. And its for women! Hahaha. When you touch it, you can feel that it is made from high quality materials. Its worth the price. :)

There was some serious mirror selfie going on in the fitting room yesterday (found the perfect fitting room for mirror selfies!) lol

I'm so in love with this red jacket. I think it looks good on me, and its perfect for our Hong Kong trip. But it was too expensive. :( Maybe next time. Nonetheless, I'm a happy birthday (not yet!) girl! :)

Happy birthday arne! You look err ... round hahaha. We celebrated his birthday by having a family dinner at one of our favorite chinese restaurant -- Big Mao.